Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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