Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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