Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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