just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
So much rum. So many feels.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
