it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize