We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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