Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.

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(770): View more from Georgia

his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning

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(519): View more from Ontario

Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.

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(417): View more from Missouri

My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(301): View more from Maryland

I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.

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(740): View more from Ohio

I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you

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(270): View more from Kentucky

Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.

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(331): View more from Illinois

Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!

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(817): View more from Texas

He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.

(972): View more from Texas

At least he's honest about how long he'll last.

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