Pappa wants mamma naked
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i dont even know how to be here
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Then you guys just all showered together...?