Little spoons don't ask big questions
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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