Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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