Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
