my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
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i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
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It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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