I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize