Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
