this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
