you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
