there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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