I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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