Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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