We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
i think i just naturally attract stoners
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
