The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize