how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I just forgot I was standing up.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
