We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
