my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
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