If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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