you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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