We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize