He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize