ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize