How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Sex with a fat chick.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.