Texts From Last Night

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  (905): View more from Toronto

  I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it

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  (905): I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it http://tfl.nu/0syl
  Replies (18) Good night (941) Bad night (2674)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her

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  (416): I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her http://tfl.nu/l0xk
  Replies (31) Good night (890) Bad night (2885)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?

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  (570): is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs? http://tfl.nu/dpsw
  Replies (21) Good night (4342) Bad night (860)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  should I fuck that poor girl

  (1-770): View more from Georgia

  no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion

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  (770): should I fuck that poor girl (1-770): no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion http://tfl.nu/i8cj
  Replies (30) Good night (853) Bad night (4882)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.

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  (864): I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me. http://tfl.nu/y5s2
  Replies (30) Good night (5874) Bad night (1223)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk

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  (606): He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk http://tfl.nu/slqk
  Replies (57) Good night (892) Bad night (14871)
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  (714): View more from California

  no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you

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  (714): no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you http://tfl.nu/e8y7
  Replies (7) Good night (3040) Bad night (801)
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  (212): View more from New York

  He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.

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  (212): He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend. http://tfl.nu/rr39
  Replies (9) Good night (1084) Bad night (2126)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times

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  (417): Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times http://tfl.nu/yrqe
  Replies (3) Good night (1359) Bad night (599)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.

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  (781): Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/mycr
  Replies (9) Good night (2150) Bad night (665)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.

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  (734): I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game. http://tfl.nu/jsqs
  Replies (7) Good night (358) Bad night (671)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?

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  (419): So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk? http://tfl.nu/8zbp
  Replies (8) Good night (625) Bad night (1087)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.

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  (520): Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions. http://tfl.nu/3zgw
  Replies (0) Good night (639) Bad night (407)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.

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  (256): I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula. http://tfl.nu/7slm
  Replies (0) Good night (202) Bad night (524)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Cat or human?

  (563): View more from Iowa

  Human

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  (563): I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one. (262): Cat or human? (563): Human http://tfl.nu/rvyr
  Replies (1) Good night (539) Bad night (192)

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