what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
