every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize