You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
