i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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