He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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