I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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