exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
it was like eating out sand paper
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It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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