Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
