I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
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He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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