I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
