fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
