That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
