she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
