But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
