I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
