he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize