I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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