who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
third nipple confirmed
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.