Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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