..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
