I got chris browned last night
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
