Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
